HUMOR: An annotated thermometer
Kevin Hester (kevinh@prolific.com)
Fri, 28 Feb 1997 15:16:10 -0800
> An annotated thermometer (degrees Fahrenheit)
>
>
> 60 - Californians put on sweaters
> (if they can find one in their wardrobe)
>
> 50 - Miami residents turn on the heat
>
> 40 - You can see your breath
> Californians shiver uncontrollably
> Minnesotans go swimming
>
> 35 - Italian cars don't start
>
> 32 - Water freezes
>
> 30 - You plan your vacation to Australia
> Minnesotans put on T-shirts
> Politicians begin to worry about the homeless
> British cars don't start
>
> 25 - Boston water freezes
> Californians weep pitiably
> Minnesotans eat ice cream
> Canadians go swimming
>
> 20 - You can hear your breath
> Politicians begin to talk about the homeless
> New York City water freezes
> Miami residents plan vacation further South
>
> 15 - French cars don't start
> You plan a vacation in Mexico
> Cat insists on sleeping in your bed with you
>
> 10 - Too cold to ski (in California)
> You need jumper cables to get the car going
>
> 5 - You plan your vacation in Houston
> American cars don't start
>
> 0 - Alaskans put on T-shirts
> Too cold to skate (in California)
>
> -10 - German cars don't start
> Eyes freeze shut when you blink
>
> -15 - You can cut your breath with a knife and use it to build an
igloo
> Arkansans stick tongue on metal objects
> Miami residents cease to exist
>
> -20 - Cat insists on sleeping in your pajamas with you
> Politicians actually do something about the homeless
> Minnesotans shovel snow off roof
> Japanese cars don't start
>
> -25 - Too cold to think
> You need jumper cables to get the driver going
>
> -30 - You plan a two week hot bath
> The Mighty Monongahela freezes
> Swedish cars don't start
>
> -40 - Californians disappear
> Minnesotans button top button
> Canadians put on sweaters
> Your car helps you plan your trip South
>
> -50 - Congressional hot air freeze
> Alaskans close the bathroom window
>
> -80 - Hell freezes over
> Polar bears move south
>
> -90 - Lawyers put their hands in their own pockets